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Saturday, October 30, 2010

Spooky Fishing - Chipty's Halloween Edition

Well hello there are you ghosts, goblins, ghouls, and slutty nurses. Welcome back to Chipty’s world and thanks for reading my special Halloween Edition. Now you must be thinking, how on earth can you relate fishing and Halloween, other than, going fishing on Halloween? Well, yours truly has done it. And let’s be honest.. that’s kind of the reason why I write these things and you guys read them (that was quite a pat on the back – yes, I’m shameless).

The Halloween Edition came as a request, straight from the top, and I’ll be honest, the first thing that came to mind was an 18th installment of the ever frightening – and still classic – Jason movies. Jason returns with a fishing rod? Or, “Oh no, Jason Forgot his Tacklebox.” How about a futuristic one where Jason wires all the lakes on the planet with TNT and kills all aquatic life as we know it, which in turn, sours our water sources and eventually wipes out the planet. Alright, sounds more like a Dr. Evil plot but, in any event, I decided not to go the Jason route. Instead, I put together the Top 10 Reasons why Fishing is Better than Halloween. I hope you guys enjoy, and if you’re feeling saucy, post your favorite reasons why fishing is better than Halloween in the comments section below. Or as always, email them to me (or suggestions, comments, concerns, phone numbers) at Chipty@FishAddix.com.

Top 10 Reasons Why Fishing is Better than Halloween:

10) If a witch (or other strange creature) crosses your path while you’re fishing, you can STAB it and you’ll be the stuff legends are made of.

9) While fishing, treats come in the 3lb variety, instead of individually wrapped.

8) You don’t HAVE TO bring your wife/spouse with you (you can though, ya know, as an option).

7) You get to dress like a tool all year round – instead of just once a year (yeah that means you – in the vest with all sorts of lures attached to it… and that hat… uhhhgggg).

6) If you are fishing, then you’re not at home, so who cares who knocks at the door.

5) You don’t mind seeing the biggons’ (big ones) in fish nets (in fact – you kind of like it).

4) You don’t have to inspect your food when you’re fishing because you didn’t get it from the crack den in the next town that everyone knows about but never mentions.

3) You can still go out and fish when you’re 30 years old and people won’t judge you (or kick you off their porch – not that you’d be fishing on someone’s porch, but you could be).

2) If you say, “lure it,” people don’t think you’re a pedophile.

1) If a sexy nurse/cop/school girl (of age of course) comes and talks to you while you’re fishing, it’s not because they are looking for free candy (although they might be looking for something else – yeah you know what I’m talking about “big guy”……. directions of course).

Well I hope you guys enjoyed the Halloween article. I hope to hear from you guys soon, with comments or suggestions. Thanks for reading.

Fish On!
CHIPTY

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

So What Is IT?!?

It’s like getting the cliff notes on Harry Potter because this chick you like is into it but you’re not about to waste your Saturday reading 700 page novels one after the other like you’re pouring them down a beer bong. It’s like reading Wikipedia when you should probably get your information from a source that doesn’t allow everyone with an internet connection and the ability to type to weigh in on important subject matter. It’s like using a debit/credit card versus writing a check. In short – it’s a mind blowing, life changing, world altering, technological advance that once you start using it – you won’t remember what you did without it.

SO WHAT IS IT?

Under great controversy, FishAddix has launched a revolutionary new fishing tool. A tool born out of the call from FishAddix Members for more of the best fishing information anywhere.

FishAddix Tips

Learning from FishAddix has just gotten a whole lot easier. FishAddix Tips has been born and is ready for use now!
· The Tips tool will allow other members to publish Tips on lakes, lures, or techniques
· These Tips will be searchable inside your fishing reports and then on a larger scale
· They’ll also be searchable by the lakes or bodies of water they are originally associated with
· All the Tips published within the reports for that lake will be filtered out and will be accessible on another page separate from the reports they were posted in but still sorted by lake – these Tips will just sit there, ripe for the picking.

All these Tips sitting right there, awaiting your greedy little paws to grab those knowledge nuggets and devour it along with all its friends :-)

Check out your favorite Place To Fish or Report Now and Post A Tip!


The beauty of the Tips tool is that you’ll no longer have to wade through pages of dry and idle reports, talking about what color Gatorade the person drank that day, or how the humid air made someone start chaffing. Instead you’ll be able to access the Tips and suggestions for lakes and lures apart from anything else. You’ll feel like Johnny-Five in Short Circuit, reading books and pages a mile a minute. Being able to publish, read, search, and sort Tips will give FishAddix an unadulterated edge over any competition on the web and beyond (yes you Buzz Lightyear).

I’ve continually said that FishAddix is limited only by the minds and imaginations of those who choose to be involved and this brain-child is a true testament to that statement. We really hope you enjoy the new addition – and we’d love to hear your feedback or suggestions for the site.

Enjoy the knowledge… and… Fish On!!!
CHIPTY

Please send comments or suggestions to chipty@fishaddix.com.

Saturday, October 9, 2010

A Three Hour Tour!!

Good evening folks. Or morning, or afternoon, or mid-day… Good (fill in your own damn time of day) folks. Well it’s nearing the end of the fishing season for most of us (except for you crazy ass ice-fishermen), and I thought I should write an ode to the season and what a great year of fishing it has been for so many. How many fish have been caught, and how many beers have been drank, how many stories have been told and how many friendships have been forged…. but I couldn’t think of anything to rhyme it to so instead…. I’ve written an arbitrary jingle to the Gilligan’s Island theme song.

Sorry for pulling at your heart strings with the tease of an ode to fishing stories, and friendships, and all that mumbo jumbo. But we’ll have to save the tear jerkers for another time.

Now although the fishing season is being replaced with raking leaves and making snow angels (you fairies), don’t be afraid to log into FishAddix.com during the offseason on a regular basis to see what’s new and exciting. Be sure to hone your skills during the offseason and share your tips and tricks with the community. Well, I’m sure I’ll be seeing you before the official close of the season so have a good few weeks of fishing and I look forward to hearing from you guys and reading your reports through the “wire.” Enough tom-foolery for now.. enjoy the Gilligan’s Island Ode and I’ll see you next time. (I do suggest listening to the actual theme song a couple times before reading this, It’ll do wonders for your musical timing and rhythm.)

Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale,
A tale of a fateful trip
That started in a college dorm,
Born was a brainchild so hip.

The mate was a mighty business man,
The skipper with tackle and lure.
FishAddix opened its doors that day
For a three hour tour, a three hour tour.

The traffic started picking up,
The domain name was almost lost,
If not for the courage of the website crew
The fishing reports would be lost, the fishing reports would be lost.

The dot-com set ground on the shores of this uncharted world wide web
With Joseph K.
And James too,
The design team, and their pals,
The graphics crew
Chipty and Mary Ann,
Here on FishAddix dot com.

Fish On,
CHIPTY